1. |
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When I am no longer even a memory, just a name, I hope my voice may perpetuate the great work of my life. God bless my dear old comrades of Balaclava and bring them safe to shore.
-Florence Nightingale
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2. |
Birth
05:51
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Born today
Can he find his way?
A curtain falls
Time to start a new play
Dreams turn to ash
Gone in a flash
Locked in the past
Open your eyes
Welcome to the world
Confused for now
This new place unfurled
Losing my touch
It hurts too much
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3. |
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Ever since Mom died you've hated me
Never given me a chance to let you see
Everything I do
I do it for you
But you just throw it back at me
Ever since Mom died you're drunk everyday
Bringing home whores to pass the time away
You don't have a job
You're a real slob
Lord knows I don't want to be you someday
I can't see them
Don't rearrange it
On the surface
Fall into pieces
All my wishes
They're not for me
Why don't you care about me?
Out in the night leaving me empty
Through the glass I see a familiar face
She comforts me then quickly fades away
Ever since mom died you're miserable
Depression pills straight down the hole
The drugs don't last
You're stuck in the past
I'd pity you if it didn't get so old
Ever since mom died the fault is mine
It's a disaster when it's just fine
If I weren't here
You wouldn't fear
'Cause she'd be with you 'till the end of time
I can't see them
Don't rearrange it
On the surface
Fall into pieces
All my wishes
They're not for me
Why don't you care about me?
Out in the night leaving me empty
Through the glass I see a familiar face
She comforts me then quickly fades away
Why don't you care about me?
Out in the night leaving me empty
Through the glass I see a familiar face
She comforts me then quickly fades away
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4. |
Circles in the Sand
04:23
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And the circles waver in the sand by the shore
I refuse to speak with him anymore
A large dividing space is now clear
He has become my greatest fear
Escape through the doorway, run down the street
My lust for a new life deters his greed
The air hitting my face is beauty to me
Never look back now, I'm finally free
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5. |
Remedy
04:06
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I can feel the, like, blood...coarsing through my arm. I can, like, pick out one molecule of blood and, like, you know, follow it throughout my entire body. And you're not aware that you have the ability to do that but, as human beings, we can literally feel everything that functions within our body if our brain allows us to.
I feel like time is going by so fast, and I'm talking so much, but I don't feel anything, and I forget everything, and time is going by so...so slow. Every time I look at the clock I panic in my head because I realize that, like, two minutes has passed but it seems like an eternity.
There's a place we can go..it's not here...and it's not...its not reality.
I literally feel like I could die right now. I'm not going to die and I'm not getting sick or anything but I mean, like, I feel like if I just closed my eyes and went to sleep I wouldn't wake up.
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6. |
Break Away
11:04
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The smoke rises to my face
Can't breathe, all erased
I can't imagine life away from you
And I can't help this feeling you give me
(What have I turned into?)
And I'm kneeling at your feet
And I'm closer than I've ever been before
(You first wake up...you think...was that a dream? But that happens to me over and over again, and it won't stop. I wake up, and talk to you, and then, I wake up again.)
(I want it back. I want reality back. I've lived a thousand lives in one second. I'm dying a thousand deaths. I want to know what comes next. What happens? What's at the end?)
Fall into a deep sleep
Fall down and weep
Break away
Seize the day
Fade away
No more pain
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7. |
Leave Me
03:58
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All on my own again
Trying to pass for a friend
Yell, but I am not found
Out in the streets tonight
Cursed by my failing sight
Collapsing to the ground
Go sit out on the street and wait for me
Hopes left behind my life left empty
Don't follow that man into the car
Don't leave me with this gaping scar
No one wants me
It's kind of hard to say
But no one sees me
I cannot find my way
It's a fucked up reality
I'm here to stay
But no one tells me
I'm left in my grave
But no one kills me
I'm the one that isn't saved
Lost for eternity
To fade into the grey
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8. |
The Fake Reality
10:51
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I need more
More than me
But I'm constrained and cannot breathe
I am lost
Like a child in the woods
Maybe I should live in my dreams
I have run
Far away from my past
But it keeps catching up to me
Fall into
Something that'll last
I'll take shelter in this fake reality
I dream of another place that is not like here
A place where I have no reason to run or fear
The waters are rising, I hope to drown
And maybe I'll see this new world I've found
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9. |
Death
13:57
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A car comes rushing down the street towards me
Fall into the light
Shot down by my own infidelity
Say goodnight
I've lived my whole life like it was all just pretend
A future without you
It's the little things that really matter in the end
A new life (lie) for you
Why can't my hands feel the touch of my cold skin?
Pain ends and I'm here
No more thoughts, no more wondering where I've been
Living without fear
They're rushing in
They've come to take somewhere far away from here
It's funny
Death isn't quite as bad as I feared
Feared, as I feared
Feared
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TEN23 Stillwater, Oklahoma
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